On parenting and leadership. UPDATED.

I had to chuckle this morning reading my weekly e-column from John Rosemond, an advocate of “traditional parenting,” or how parents raised children two generations ago before “The Big Wet Blanket of Psychobabble was thrown over common sense.”  I’m reading one of Rosemond’s books (this one if you’re interested, but this one is on the way).  

He writes:

the fundamentals of “Leadership Parenting” are also the fundamentals of “Leadership Teaching.” Primary among said fundamentals is the need to say what you mean in the fewest words possible and mean what you say. That is how one gets a child to respect and obey legitimate authority. Reward and punishment may accomplish that same end, but only temporarily.

Easy peasy, right?  And it’s true.  My students never questioned my leadership in a classroom.  (I wish I could explain that to my toddler).

But here’s the rather timely chuckle:

It is not enough to be in a position of leadership. After all, there are plenty of examples of people who occupy positions of leadership who are not effective leaders. Many politicians fall into this category. In that regard, it is interesting that many of today’s parents act more like politicians than leaders. They are concerned with approval. They explain themselves, which is the mark of people who lack confidence in their own decisions. They engage in debates with their children. They offer entitlements to their children and then wonder why their children take them for granted and demand more and more entitlement.

Democrats in a nutshell. 

See Pundette for some “snarkasm” regarding Obama’s latest attempt to look authoritative from the Oval Office tonight.

UPDATE:

Rosemond must know Michael Barone.  This morning’s column, “The price of perpetual adolescence,” speaks to “The Big Wet Blanket of Psychobabble” parenting, or the newfound tendency of children to never grow up as a direct result of their parents refusing to truly parent. 

An article in the New York Times examines the trend toward prolonged adolescence. It notes that an increasing percentage of people in their twenties are living with their parents, and that’s with pre-recession data; presumably it’s higher today. Also, “Adults between 18 and 34 received an average of $38,000 in cash and two years’ worth of full-time labor from their parents, or about 10 percent of their income,”
Barone’s suggestions for government restrictions on those “children” who at 26 will remain on their parents’ insurance plans including curfews to prevent “expensive” health care costs:
 
Late night activities can result in increased rates of accidents and unplanned pregnancies, so they may be required to be home by 10:30 on weeknights and midnight on weekends. Extended periods of idleness and physical inactivity can promote obesity and attendant health care problems, so they may be required to do household chores including laundry, window washing, lawn mowing and cleaning out the garage. Substantial alcohol consumption and tobacco use, not to mention the use of controlled substances, can cause expensive health care problems, so they may be required to submit to laws on alcohol and tobacco use otherwise applicable only to those under age 21. And given the concerns about brain damage from excessive cellphone use, they may be subject to limits on the number of minutes they can talk each day
The antidote to perpetual adolescence: leadership and common sense. 
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2 Responses

  1. Excellent post! Thanks for the tip on Rosemond, I am going to look into his books. I’ve been looking for some traditional parenting inspiration.

    • Thanks, Lisa! I *really* like Rosemond. A friend passed on his potty training method (bare bones, no singing potties, matter of fact. The “naked and $75” method: naked from the waist down, clean the carpets afterward. He says it works in three days. We were rolling by day two, and I was hooked. (She was just shy of 20 mo).
      Since we’ve had so much upheaval the past two months, he’s been a source of patience and wisdom since pjToddler tests EVERY boundary right now. And we’re regaining some sanity via Rosemond.

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