Have you stopped beating your wife?

Okay, so that’s not exactly the question I heard over the phone, but it was akin to that….  I’ve lived in nine of these great United States and apparently we’ve now moved into the pollsters’ goldmine.  Almost every night the phone rings and the caller ID shows ### Research. 

At first I was pretty excited.  When I was younger, I was envious of the families who were selected for the little box by the Nielsen people.  To be able to influence which television shows were on? Wow.  But now a pollster is calling ME? Someone wants to know what I think about POLITICS? Really? Might my poll response actually influence what happens on the HILL? I was giddy with excitement.  “Yes, yes!” I breathed, “I can take a moment to answer a few short questions!”

You can tell I’m new at this.

While they didn’t ask the wife beating question, I found myself in that same fix.  I didn’t see it coming because they start off easy.

Male/Female?

Age – they give a nice 15 year range, thankfully.  So nice to still be included with the younger set.

Then suddenly you get to the meaty questions…

Would you say that in the next election that you would support…?

A. Continuation of the policies as enacted by the current administration to stimulate jobs and the economy and continue on the road to recovery…

Or…

B. Resort to grasping at failed policies that created this disaster and embrace the fanatical extremism that is embodied by the radical Tea Party candidates….

((Silence))

I was waiting for option C or at least a wry chuckle followed by, “Just kidding…”  And in full disclosure, those weren’t exactly the wording of the questions, but you get the point – there was no way I could answer.  Easier to win the conversation on wife beating.  I did not know that polls were designed to, ahem; nudge you into a certain answer.  (I told you I was new at this.)

Sadly, it’s not just polls. 

From our POTUS, courtesy Fox News:

“People out there are still hurting very badly, and they are still scared. And so part of the reason that our politics seems so tough right now, and facts and science and argument does not seem to be winning the day all the time, is because we’re hard-wired not to always think clearly when we’re scared,” Obama said at a Democratic fundraiser Saturday in Boston. “And the country is scared, and they have good reason to be.”

President Obama evidently has a future in writing questions for polls.  Either you (A) think clearly and vote for Democrats, or you (B) are scared and vote Republican.   Back to beating your wife again. 

Actually, these days it feels more like beating my head against the wall. 

I am new at this.  Thanks to PJ Mom for entrusting her site to my greenhorn self.  Hope I don’t run her aground while at the helm.

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3 Responses

  1. Ah! A push poll, is it? (I’m new to this, I tell ya’!) Manny, I’ll have to keep your idea in mind. Before the “no call” law, I had a ton of amusing tricks for those pesky telemarketers. I’ll have to brush some of that thinking off for the pollsters, too!

    PJMom, are you home yet? Too few days and too many topics to cover! 🙂

  2. I’ve been getting polled just about every week. But I haven’t had a push poll like that in a while. You should have lied and told them you were supporting the Democrat and let their polling results be erroneous.

  3. Brava!

    I am impressed by the push poll, but you’re in a “swing” state now. And they have to frighten as many people as they can. (Kinda amazing, still, though, to show your colors so absolutely, no?) I became a member of Zogby’s online panel two years ago and he’s not quite as … transparent. ; )

    p.s. You couldn’t run the site into the ground. I do a good enough job on my own lol. Again thanks–LOVE both the title and the post (though you shame me–you have thoughtful, incicisve commentary and your baby is younger than mine. In addition to teaching your two. ; )

    Miss you.

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